So in November I had some help dying blue streaks in my hair. I've wanted to dye my hair for years but I never have; so my all or nothing tendency is to go from nothing to literal blue. Anyways, short story shorter, the streaks faded out and I ended up dying all of my hair blue. While I've been wanting to dye it blue long before, rewatching Pacific Rim really did something to me. I wasn't going to do a post about it but I had gotten my sister to help me dye my hair and neither of us knew what we were doing so her expressions are hilarious and I (with her permission) wanted to share them because they are just too good to bury in my photo history.
Before
Before at the back
This is about the point where my mom pointed out that my sister was missing some of my hair at the front and she went 'oh!' and then went to fix it and I was telling her 'oh!' in response to 'you're missing some of the hair' is not what I want to hear when you're dying my hair. this whole process was janky and chaotic and I loved every second
There is a meme for this face
I don't like this photo but it was so on point to the whole process our comb is really cheap and my hair is hard to brush through when it's wet or whatever you'd consider dye in your hair
If this face doesn't sum up my life I don't know what does
Blue hair is so hard to have show up on camera but my sister and I did our best.
I flipping love my hair.
I wouldn't have traded anything for the absolutely unprepared, broken clipped, slightly unhinged process that we had.
I was nervous about this fall. I was worried I was going to miss it and the thing is I've needed this fall. I was feeling overwhelmed and I wasn't sure I was going to be able to slow my mind down enough to be able to enjoy it. Sure it was incredibly busy, I mean life has been insane. It always is, but chaos in my family seems to come in two's and three's and the crises never seem to be little things. I really didn't think i was going to get it and I needed this fall. Anyways, I had a few things I wanted to do and for the most part I did it. I even did more than I thought I could've hoped to get to.
1. Carved Pumpkins And Wore A Pumpkin Head In The Woods.
Pumpkin heads are really heavy. No one talks about that. It sounds really aesthetic but dang I had a tender spot on my head for days. Glad I finally got to do it though.
You can barely tell but I used a pink shower cap underneath which is the funniest unaesthetic thing to put with a jack-o-lantern and I low-key love it
2. Smashed Pumpkins In The Woods With Some Siblings
Setting them up like this reminded me of a boyband and I still think it's a lot funnier than it actually is
3. Fall Books I Read (to be fair, I started some early)
The Secret History by Donna Tart
The Book Thief by Markus Zusak
The Halloween Tree by Ray Bradbury
I reread a good chunk of Fangirl by Rainbow Rowell
I've been reading the Haunting of Hill House by Shirley Jackson
I've been reading Lore by Allen Menke
While it doesn't feel like enough to count, I read the first couple chapters of The Last Unicorn by Peter S. Beagle. I'll probably have to return it to the library and recheck it out but sometimes I need to remind myself of the books or I'll forget about them later
To be honest I didn't think I was going to get through The Secret History before October was over so the amount I got to even if some of the books were small or I've only read bits of them is an accomplishment.
3. Scary Movie Night/Fallish or Halloween Movies in General/Music
I more or less did this one. I do still want to do a proper one but I still could. There's really nothing stopping me.
I did movies in general quite a lot. I didn't really have a list I was following so I watched whatever I wanted to watch and I've had the realization confirmed (once again) that everything can be a fall movie if you want it to be.
Stardust and Interview With A Vampire were ones that I was not expecting to have as much fun watching as I did. My unintentional vibe for this fall was a combination of sad girl autumn and 80's fantasy movie aesthetic. Whether I accomplished that or not I don't know but I've had fun. It's probably been more of a slightly 2000's vibe in all honesty
4. Did A Corn Maze/Ate Mini-Donuts
Went to a zombie themed corn maze that had 4 different trails you could pick from. I loved it, I was nervous about the clowns but eventually when you and pretty much everyone in the maze is all standing there trying to find out from the clowns how you leave because no one could find their way out was kind of hilarious and honestly it was the best one of the mazes. After the first maze all the other mazes the zombies just sort of stayed in their designated attractions. I never thought I would say there was a surprising lack of zombies at a zombie centric maze. It made me happy though. The corn was tall, the music was very creepily whimsical, the moon was out and I loved all of it.
My sister and I
My spirit animal/creature. I don't actually know what this was supposed to be but I love it
5. Baking (Cheater's Edition)
So I really wanted to do some fall baking particularly bat cookies and cinnamon rolls. I was either too busy or too tired to actually do any baking but I bought cinnamon rolls later and I found this box of bat brownies which wasn't good but they were shaped like bats and that's all I really cared about.
Not related to baking but I got to eat some plums and concord grapes. I'm always excited for concord grapes every time fall comes around
6. My Fall Mementos
A crow
A cat cup
A notebook with constellations all over the cover
This looks like I'm hoarding sparklers, which I do, but in this case I was lighting them and handing them out
7. Fall Walks (Particularly at Night)
Honestly this is the reason why I feel like I got fall. I was so concerned about doing things that felt fall and then I went for a quick fall walk one day on my path in the woods gave me every emotion and fall feeling that I've been so anxious to capture. It's such a small thing but it was somehow possibly my favourite thing this fall. I don't how I would have been without them.
8. Razor Ride And Hitting Puddles
I feel like this one needs very little explanation. Except all of us in the razor got very soaked, cold, and covered in mud. It was amazing.
9. Got A Starbucks Fall Drink And Tim Horton's Peach Quenchers
The quenchers were supposed to just be a summer item on their menu but it must have done so well they're still selling it and I'm incredibly happy about it.
10. Saw A Sketchy Animal Skeleton (there's a photo)
On one razor ride I was on, all of us in the razor passed a skeleton of some animal that looked burnt and was just very clearly sketchily put there by a human. It's gone now and now there's a toolbox there, but it was in such a weird place to just leave an animal. So who knows what that means exactly. To be fair, it might have been covered in mud but I still think it was burnt.
The top part looks like a head in the photo but that's really the back end of whatever this animal is. Where it's head or legs are we have no idea.
11. Did A Sort of College and Career Scavenger Hunt Thing
Essentially all the groups got the same list pf things you were supposed to take a picture with or take back with you.
A Tim Horton's cup
A stop sign
Newspaper with today's date
Hang on the monkey bars
Find an acorn (nobody could find one)
Take a photo with a person walking their dog (the random stranger we asked was so nice about it. Shockingly it's not the first time she's been asked by groups doing something like this)
Because you got extra points for creativity my group all posed like dogs peeing on a fire hydrant. So that's a thing that exists on someone's phone.
We had an hour and a half and a list of like 40 things to hit and whichever group got more things won. My group sadly lost but it was really fun. Definitely recommend frantically running to locations in the dark with a group of friends/people that you feel pretty safe with and looking crazy.
12.Looking At Stars
This is connected to the fall walks one, but it deserves it's own thing.
Not the stars obviously but still
13. Looking At Trailers
This is a personal thing. My sister and I are looking at cheap trailers and it's been a big thing we've been doing for awhile so I'm adding it.
And the thing is, fall isn't over. October might be, as sad as I am about that, but I don't have to have missed anything. I got, and still have, my fall.
For the fall I feel like I fought for a little in my own melodramatic way
Thanks to McKayla for tagging me for this! I've been pretty dead to the world, working, pretending I've been doing homework that I haven't, ignoring the insanity of life in general, stolen my fall moments, and I will probably continue to do that for awhile. I have a lot going on so this was fun to work on while I had a day where I did absolutely nothing.
What is your favourite book/series and why?
I recently ordered the Solitary Tales by Travis Thrasher. I've read them before a couple years ago and really liked them. They've all finally arrived now so currently that's the series I'm most excited about.
It's very American Gothic and perfect for this time of year. It makes me think of the smell of leaves on a fall walk. I don't how to explain it but it has an almost M Night Shyamalan movie feel to me. I'm usually pretty picky, especially with Christian books, but I really liked this series. Chris, the protagonist, can be dumb but it worked.
One of the greatest books ever written is 'The Muppets Meet the Classics: The Phantom of the Opera'
It's essentially the original Phantom of the Opera story, but with Muppets and it's the stupidest thing I've ever read and more people need to know that this book is real. It's a glorious thing. I've owned it for years and I'd completely forgotten about it until I was going through my books recently.
Who is your favourite author?
At this moment it's Shirley Jackson. She wrote We Have Always Lived in the Castle and I've been reading The Haunting of Hill House while on my work breaks and I've been loving it. I haven't gotten too far into it yet, but she's such a good writer.
What is your favourite food?
There's so many things. One is Pho. It's a Vietnamese noodle soup dish. It's so good. I highly recommend it.
Not my photo. It's from google images. I saw something about a creator called Journeyonair attached to it.
What gives you inspiration for your books?
Everything to be honest. Music, any sort of media really, emotions, the weather, the way something smells...
This is an odd one but the spaciousness of something or the tactile-ness of things affects a lot.
Are you an introvert or an extrovert?
Introvert. Some things are better with groups of people but I'm definitely an introvert at heart.
If you had a warning label what would yours say?
I feel like I have a lot but then I felt odd writing it for myself so I asked Skye (thanks btw!) and her answers were better than anything I was going to write for myself anyway so I'm hijacking those.
Crazy, clearly.
Prone to overthinking and analyzing. Don't try to sort it out for her. Will return to normal in 1 and a half business days.
Practically a cryptid. Quite possibly the last of her kind.
Feel free to to this tag if you'd like! What's the strangest book you've ever read?
In the anime The Ancient Magus Bride, there's Elias as shown in the GIF below
He has his 'Mage Apprentice' named Chise which is a terrible way to explain their relationship dynamic but we don't have time to unpack it. Anyways, Elias doesn't really understand human emotion and sometimes in the show he will explain to Chiro a feeling he had and he asks her what it is. She'll tell him and then there will be a cut to a water droplet hitting a smooth watery surface because what she said suddenly made so much sense. It's exactly what he was feeling and it couldn't have been anything else. It's actually kind of hilarious how confusing he finds basic emotions (although it's not ridiculously overdone). But anyways, discovering the Final Girl trope and recognizing Final Girl energy in things was my water-drop moment. It's something I've always loved even though I didn't know it was a thing that existed. That and finding out that the monster boi trope was a thing. So many things clicked into place in my head. It feels like an understatement to say that a movie trope/energy changed my life in the best way. Because it is such a deeply personal, and emotion-based thing it's hard to put into words everything I mean. The weird spiderweb of how my brain works attaching to things that don't make sense and tying it all together. Sometimes I want to spill it out, hence this post a little, but other times I'm like, I get it and that's all I care about.
Sometimes it's enough that you know you love them Words are hard.
Before I continue, I think it's important to explain that I don't really like to watch media through a *fails to think of the word I was going for* 'realistic lense' I guess? Dylan Is In Trouble on Youtube had a video addressing some people's complaints about his reaction to a movie that he'd done a video about that he didn't like and some people took it personally. Anyways, he was trying to carefully explain that he's not watching things to make a point, it's intentionally stupid. He's watching things to be entertained. He was using an example that some people watch things and they're viewing is through a very realistic lense, and take lessons from it, whereas he watches it with a disconnect from reality. He's often jokingly calling for people to murder each other in like every movie he watches and he explained that obviously he would be horrified by that in real life. Anyways, people took it way too personally and it was a little bit dumb that he even had to explain that because most people get what he means. I'm absolutely butchering this, but essentially I don't watch things and look at the characters as role models as an example. The way I relate to things is usually a little less direct most of the time. There's exceptions obviously, it's just I don't like when attention is called to a thing inside of a medium itself, I much prefer a thing when it's just a thing that's happening and if I take something away from it that's up to me to do. Most of the time anyways, but that's just what I do. Everyone attaches to things differently. The characters I relate to different aspects of usually aren't people that are supposed to be looked up to or were even meant to be looked up to.
I love and relate to emotion based things, and I can't express how much I love those moments in film when a character's mask comes off and you see them for everything. The fun, the dark, the honesty of it feels like breathing to me when it happens. I'm generally a very analytical person so I'll read into things and give things that mean everything to me meanings that probably were never intentional. I get annoyed when someone else in the media does it for me. It's like I can see the the script directions through the screen as opposed to forgetting to watch the invisible hand carefully moving the pieces. A big pet peeve of mine is media that feels like it knows it's being watched, so it goes out of it's way to emphasize that it's doing a thing. I'm sick of things trying to be the next great american novel, I just want it to be an experience. The fact that I'm here means you already interested me in some way, I don't need the movie to justify why I'm here. I don't want to justify anything, if I'm here I'm here. I'm not out here trying to prove anything to anybody. I have my hills, but this is not one of them. I'm a firm believer that if you've done it well enough (but also writing/art/making any sort of media is insanely difficult so genuine kuddos to everyone) you don't have to explain it. Most people will get it, and if they don't, you did, so there's always that. But it's so nice when other people do as well.
I stand by that this is Tom Cruise's best role XD Now that is one of my hills.
So now that I've talked for way too long about how I really dislike things being 'about' things being addressed without feeling intrinsically necessary, let me contradict myself and briefly talk about my love of Final Girl energy and what it means to me with about as much depth as the voice of a movie chipmunk. I will be brief is what I'm trying to say. Also know that Skye did a similar post last year that I will be shamelessly stealing from so I'm giving the credit now (Skye's Monster Bois and Final Girls Post)
This snippet from her post sort of briefly summed up what I'm trying to say in this post.
'So aside from me being haunted by monster bois. I have a whole new appreciation for final girls. I don’t know what it is about the girl starting off naïve and seemingly weak. Only to go through something insanely traumatic and not only survive it but take down their tormentor in the process. I dunno I love it! I feel like my twenties have been somewhat feral and similar in a way. I’ve learned to hold my ground and fight back.
So watching these girls survive hellish situations and come out covered in blood in and a thick layer of cynicism is somewhat of a revelation. It’s surprisingly motivating and something that resonates with me.'
Skye's post about 'The Heroine's Journey' also touches on reasons I love the Final Girl trope.
I did a post sort of vaguely addressing my love of angry characters and I think it still holds up for me. (Angry Characters Post)
I think what it comes down to most of the time is I love the fight in characters. Harnessing rage. Although some of that might be blurring between the actual trope of Final Girl and confusing it with female rage.
It's hard to explain it without context but I love when moments like this happen
the contrast
(context: I'm pretty sure someone kidnapped Chise or seriously injured her or something)
Something about the coldness of it, the silent gaping breath of it on an emotional level appeals to me. A moment of stark rawness
Although this is more of a Final Girl/Final Girl Energy post so I'll mention some name of actual final girls. The point still stands though. When I say Final Girl energy I'm more referring to characters not from slasher movies. Something about Final Girl energy feels hopeful, the survival instinct. Sometimes these characters didn't have much going for them at the start but they end up fighting to save themselves, be that physically or more of a mental thing. But again, I prefer it when it's not an blatantly intentional allegory. I like creating the allegory for myself.
Some Final Girls/Varying Obvious Levels Of Final Girl Energy:
Grace (Ready or Not)
Sidney (Scream)
Elizabeth Swann (Pirates of the Caribbean)
Tree (Happy Death Day)
Chise (The Ancient Magus Bride)
Coraline (Coraline)
Lisa (Red Eye)
Sarah (Labyrinth)
Ophelia (Pan's Labyrinth)
Ripley (Alien)
Nancy (Stranger Things)
Veronica Mars (Veronica Mars)
Casey (Split/Glass)
Veronica (Heathers)
Ivy (The Village)
Wichita and Little Rock (Zombieland)
Harley Quinn (Birds of Prey version in particular has some Final Girl energy) (That scene on the dock with the echo-y voices was a particular final girl energy moment for me)
There's so many more but I'm blanking on them. I find Final Girls in all their harnessed rage, blood-soaked clothes, and will to live inspiring. It's cathartic and it makes me happy. They're broken but they don't let it beat them. They carry on and they hold their ground while they fight for themselves.
I had a more cohesive idea for this post and it didn't touch on half the points I wanted to, but still, I think you guys get the point.
I just think it's neat.
Slight update: In hindsight of this post, I realized I should have put more gifs of actual final girls and less of Elias from The Ancient Magus Bride but the points still stand. Monster Bois need love too. Even bonehead ones.
Thank the blogger who nominated you in the blog post and link back to their blog. (Thanks Samantha!, I really needed something like this)
Answer the 11 questions the blogger asked you.
Nominate 11 new blogs to receive the award and write them 11 new questions.
List the rules and display the Sunshine Blogger Award logo in your post and/or on your blog.
I've been super busy lately so I've sort of fallen of blogging, commenting, and doing pretty much everything, so this was a perfect tag to pop back in with.
1. What is the movie that you've watched that gave you the most emotions? (You can interpret this either as number or intensity. ;))
Currently it's La La Land. I rewatched it recently and it doesn't matter how many times I see it, this movie makes me so incredibly happy, also sad, but I could talk for quite a long time about it.
Phantom of the Opera 2011 at the Royal Albert Hall
It doesn't make any sense if you haven't seen this version of Phantom or La La Land but god, I want to talk about the head nod at the end of both of these movies...akjafjfk
As far as what movie has stuck with me for the longest amount of time I'll be honest it's probably Edward Scissorhands and Lilo and Stitch 1&2. It's actually sad how much I love these movies.
2. What was the first book that you fell intensely in love with?
Rules of the Road/Hope Was Here- Joan Bauer, The Sherwood Ring- Elizabeth Marie Pope, The Raven Cycle and Six of Crows. I fell in love with Kaz the moment he let someone on his own team get shot and then he walked over him. That scene was such a moment for me. Apparently nothing gets my attention like violence.
Edit: *comes shrieking back like a manic banshee* I take it back. I had a collection of the memoirs and adventures of Sherlock Holmes and it stole my 8-ish year old heart. I'll be perfectly honest not knowing that Sherlock Holmes does canonically return (for literal years, because I'm an ignorant idiot), I don't think I've ever cried over a book more than I did when Sherlock Holmes fell down Reichenbach Falls.
3. What is your least favorite question to be asked, and why?
There's so many...anything involving things that would cause arguments. The taboo thanksgiving topics if you will, politics, kids, what are you doing with your life ones, you know the kind.
A new one is 'Are you alone?' or anything that is a variation of that question. I don't care who asks it, it's terrifying.
4. What is your favorite smell? (or some of your favorites, if it's too hard to narrow it down to one)
Petrichor, coffee, vanilla, champagne and apple scented things, gasoline, sawdust, grape hubba bubba makes me incredibly nostalgic, whatever the smell of workshops and machinery is...I could keep going.
5. What's your favorite season?
Take a wild guess XD
But seriously though, it's Autumn hands down. I wish I could put into words what fall does to me.
6. Is there a book that you recommend to absolutely everyone, and if so, what is it?
It really depends on the person but I have given a few people copies of Howl's Moving Castle so that one has probably been most frequent.
7. What is the craziest thing you've ever done?
Umm...I did an ultimate frisbee game in youth group once but instead of a frisbee the youth group leader/pastor bought a bunch of dead squid. Surprisingly fun actually. Disgusting, but fun.
8. What's your favorite superhero movie, and why?
Zoom (2006) and no, I don't take criticism on that, I know what I said. XD
It's really hard to find good GIFs for this movie, but know there's a dysfunctional found family dynamic, grumpy dad dynamic, taking a ufo through a Wendy's drive through, what more could you want? Maybe I'm just biased because I grew up with this movie, but I don't care. It's underrated and it needs more appreciation. It's my campy trash and the stupid hill that I will die on.
Behold the crappy trailer
I'll admit, I feel a little burnt-out over superheroes. It's not that I don't like them, I definitely do, it's just so big now. That being said I do have quite a few. One being Birds of Prey, I know it's not exactly a super-'hero' movie, but sue me. I love it. There's a lot of really good superhero movies though it's hard to choose.
9. Do you go to the library often, and if so, how do you tend to choose books when you browse?
I do go to the library fairly frequently actually although I don't usually have long to browse. Titles and covers to be honest are the first things that catch my attention. Then I tend to read the back and flip through pages and read the opening lines.
10. What is your favorite position and place to read in (e.g. sitting in bed, lying on the couch, &c.)?
I really love reading on our wicker couch on our front porch. Having neighbours walking around sucks, but I love it there. So my favorite way to read is probably laying/sitting on the couch.
11. If your house was burning down and you could save three of your books, which three would you save, and why? (excluding the Bible. We'll assume that one of your parents saved the Bibles.)
Oof... there are some books I have that while I adore them, they're easy to replace because they're literally everywhere. It doesn't make this question pain me any less though.
I have a copy of Howl's Moving Castle that I've kept with me in my purse for years. It's gone everywhere with me.
All the Crooked Saints- Maggie Steifvater
I Capture the Castle-Dodie Smith? Ooh, actually We Have Always Lived In The Castle has a big house-fire in it. Keeping it in theme.
The almost dictionary dimensioned copy of Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell-Susanna Clarke I have
My copy of Something Wicked This Way Comes- Ray Bradbury
Reflections on Writing- Diana Wynne Jones is very important.
My Encyclopedia of Faeries book would be difficult to replace so that one might actually be one of the first I'd save.
I can't narrow it down so probably any variation of this list for whatever reason. There's so many more I'd want to take though.
Edit: I completely forgot to ask new questions. So I might put something in later.
